I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
