When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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