What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
