So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Randomize
