Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
