: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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