I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
We are all done wearing pants today
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
