South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
