Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
