office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
