Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
