I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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