i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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