oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
