Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
