So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
