Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Randomize