no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
