YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
