He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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