and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize