i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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