I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
