Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
