Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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