She's JV to your varsity
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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