absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
