what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
We need to rekindle our bromance
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
