Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
