I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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