I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
