Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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