When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
