No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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