it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
