god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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