the new term for farting is butt boxing.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Are we still banned from the library?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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