who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
