I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
