Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
