Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
