Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
