Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
