idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize