Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
