Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
