I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
