It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I FOUND THE LEGS
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
