Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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