He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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