don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I'm having to shit out rocks
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
