Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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